Monday, September 19, 2011


Congratulations to the the 2011 edition of the Phillies who clinched their 5th in a row NL East Title Saturday when they beat the Cardinals. They were able to clinch because of their starting pitching - Roy Oswalt who looked the best he has looked in many months. A healthy productive Oswalt would be a welcome edition to the playoff rotation.

The problem of course is the continued silence of the bats. Aside from an occasional hit from the regulars the team is not hitting and this will bite them in the ass when they have to face the rotations of the other playoff teams. Since returning to the lineup, Rollins has basically done nothing, and Utley, who may still be hurt has also done nothing, Howard who it is now revealed has bursitus is sitting down for awhile. That's unfortunate since I do enjoy watching him strikeout with men on base. (Do sabermetrics people look at that?)

Victorino's batting average has fallen the way a Steve Carlton slider, and Ibanez - who delivered the three run shot on Saturday to help clinch has been very spotty at best. Polanco seems to have stopped his freefall, but we can only hope that he will be a factor.

That leaves us with two regular players who have kept their part of the bargain. I speak of course of Hunter Pence and Carlos Ruiz. Both have played well.

The problem of course is that in order for the team to go deep in the playoffs they are going to need some help from those who have been stealing their paychecks. The help can't come from the likes of Martinez, Gload, Orr, or even Mayberry. Francisco is a non-factor as is Wilson Valdez. No, the help has to come from the so called core guys, and until I see them starting to hit the ball with any authority, I'll stay away from the Kool-Aid.

My point was made very clear last night when Hamels gave up home runs to Puljos and Craig. One of our Aces goes south and the Phillies bats were silenced by Chris Carpenter - the Cardinals ace. Until the shot by Craig I was switching back and forth between the Phillies and the Eagles. After the shot - no more Phillies.

Speaking of football. Penn State barely beat a Temple team that I thought could have won the game. The Temple starters matched up well against the Nits, but a lack of depth and some mistakes did them in. The Owls should do well in their conference, while PSU will be not be a factor in the Big Ten.

And now to the Eagles and Michael Vick. Wow. This kid has oodles of talent, but he got hit more last night more than an opponent going through a rope-a-dope administered by Ali. Some of the blame has to fall on the o-line who were not very good in picking up blitzes. LT Peters played an awesome game, and Herrmans was OK, but the other guys need some more work.

A lot of the blame for the loss has to rest with Vick who threw 3 picks. You can't beat a good team like the Falcons when you turn the ball over and give them great field position. It was a team loss given that the defense allowed the Falcons to overcome a 4th quarter deficit. I didn't notice our linebackers doing anything - in fact if I were grading these guys - only Cullen, Cole & the DBS would pass. The rest of them just sucked.

With Vick on the shelf with a concussion, and whatever his name as the backup, this team will go nowhere. Vince Young is hurt and we haven,t been given a timetable for his return.

Reid is not my favorite coach - you all know that. Last night he seemed to call every gimmick play in the playbook. The basic stuff was working - the were running well - McCoy looked great. Why not keep at it until it stops working? You'll have to ask Fat Andrew who probably woke up this morning still saying "we've got to do better"

Friday, September 16, 2011


I had him in my cross hairs and was prepared to level him in today's post. I am, of course, referring to Ryan Howard. I had him dead-to-rights and then the SOB went and drove in the winning run in last night's game against the Marlins - as a pinch hitter of all things! I felt deflated despite being happy that the non-hitting Phillies were able to pull out a win.

I was going to start by reminding all of you that Howard was on an 0-15 tear during which he struck out with the bases loaded at least twice, leaving all of you sabermetrics freaks in a tail spin. I was going to remind all of you who have been calling for me to give the guy some slack that his defense of late had been atrocious and that, once again(Sept 15 - being a pay day) the guy was stealing his money.

I was going to do all of that and then the guy drives in the winning run, so I'll move on and away from this fraud of a superstar and mention that he is not the only Phillie who can be accused of stealing their money. This team has not been a good offensive team all season. This will come back to bite them in the ass during the playoffs when, unfortunately, they won't have teams like the Mets or the Marlins to pick on. Shit, last night they faced a guy who was making his first MLB start of the season after a horrible nine starts in the minors and they proceeded to make him look like the next coming of Tom Seaver. Way to go guys!

The look on Cliff Lee's face after giving up the home run to Lopez in the bottom of the ninth with two outs and two strikes says it all. Lee had pitched a gem and deserved better from the offense, just as Halladay had deserved better the other night. The lack of offense is putting a ton of pressure on our staff who must believe that they have to be perfect every time out in order for the team to win. Something's got to give. Halladay, Lee, and the others have been good team members by not being critical of the offense in public, but I wonder what is being said behind closed doors. It must be salty at best.

Without a doubt, the Phillies are headed for their fifth division title in a row but, given their lack of offense and occasional defensive lapses, I wonder how many of you are confident that they will be able to get to the series, let alone win it? I am not confident at all. I am so unconfident that if I could buy puts on their chances I would go all in and load up. My friend Bob assures me that once the playoffs begin all will be well, but Bob is a Kool Aid slurper of the first magnitude and he is unable to believe anything else. What are you thinking? Have you ordered your Kool Aid yet?

I am getting aggravated talking about the Phillies, so I'll move on. Michael Vick returns to Atlanta this weekend when they Birds take on the Falcons. The Falcons are coming off an opening week loss and could provide a big test for Fat Andrew and his charges. It wouldn't surprise me if the Falcons are able to stop Vick, although I hope the O-line can continue to protect him and give us a chance for the win.

After a humiliating loss at home to a real team (Alabama), the Nittany Lions travel to the Linc to take on Temple. Last year the Owls were on the short end of a 22-13 score, but they have the horses and the desire to beat PSU for the first time since 1941. The Lions have over the years tended to feast on teams like Temple (they still have Youngstown State on the schedule) but this time I'll be rooting for the Owls. I have never rooted for a team to beat the Lions in fifty years of watching them, but I am sick and tired of watching them schedule weak sisters in order to pad their record and their check book. Not all schools do this, and it's time for the Lions to schedule teams like Pitt again. They won't do it, but they should.

That's it from me. Enjoy your weekend.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011


So there I was planted on my favorite sofa. I had a bowl of popcorn and a bowl of... something else ready for what I thought would be an easy game for the Phillies. A team on the cusp of nailing down another divisional title should not lose to a team like the Astros. If they do it should be on a fluke, not the way they lost in the debacle filled 5-1 loss last night.

Something else - if you are the Phillies you should be fined a great deal of money for being unable to hit in a loss to Brett Myers. You remember when Brett pitched here. He was okay, not special, and to me is better remembered as a guy who beat his wife almost as much as he beat other teams. Some of you might approve of such behavior - I don't. They lost to Brett Myers last night and I am appalled.

Myers, who no longer has a major league fast ball, made the local guys look silly with his 75 mph junk. That is not acceptable - not even a little bit. I don't expect this team to win every game but please - I do expect them to beat up on their former teammate.

It didn't help that Roy Oswalt did not bring his A game. Oswalt crumbled in front of his former fans helped by the worst defense I have seen the Phillies play all season. Actually, I think the bags containing the defense must have been lost by the airline that brought them to Houston from Milwaukee because nearly every ground ball became an adventure and the execution of double plays looked like a Chinese fire drill.

There was one attempt at completing a DP where Pete Orr threw a perfect cross body block on Rollins - taking him out and causing the runner to be safe at first. Rollins, who came back a couple of games before Charlie had wanted him to because of the injury to Wilson Valdez could have been hurt bad by Orr's miscue. Then where would we be?

Not satisfied with a poor effort on the mound, Oswalt had the ball pop out of his glove covering first on a DP attempt. Shit, the red neck looked like a deer caught in a headlight as he watched the ball pop out allowing the runner to reach safely.

I hope that after the game Charlie read his team. I hope he made Pete Orr cry like the bitch that he is, and read the entire team for their lack of focus and complacent play. This team is a lock to coast to a division title unless they continue to mail in their performances.

I had to turn away from the game early - out of disgust, but I was surprised when Scott called me to tell me that Ron Paul had stated that he would let the uninsured die rather than treat them with public money. Nice guy. [On the replay, it appears that it was just voices in the Tea Party crowd screaming "yes," not Ron Paul. - Editor]. I was amazed that Scott had found the Phillies so disgusting that he turned on the Tea Party Debate. There is no chance I would ever cast my vote for any of the soulless bastards who were trying to outdo each other on being the nastiest conservative on the planet. There is also no chance that Scott would ever cast his vote for any of them either - thus my amazement to learn that he was watching.

Yesterday afternoon, Scott called me to tell me that he had found something on Facebook that related to me and my very misspent youth. As he read some of the discussion to me I decided it was finally time for me to sign up so that I too could participate in the conversation. It didn't work out.

Signing up was the easy part - navigating Facebook was a disaster which was not helped by the thing Scott posted to my wall that basically showed how "old" people just can't deal with the modern world. What the fuck? I acknowledge that technology is difficult for me to get my hands around. Technology scares me, and I have never Tweeted and never will. If I want to add something to my computer I have to call somebody to do it for me. I can change a lightbulb by myself and I have learned to set my channel reminder so I won't miss my favorite shows but, after that, I am lost.

While all you techno wizards are laughing at the LSF, I remind you that when I was a kid there was no "personal" technology. If you wanted to change a channel, you got off your fat ass and changed it by turning the dial - none of this remote bullshit. If you needed to do some calculations there were no hand held calculators to make life easier - you had to use a slide rule. Shit, I'm betting that some of you techno-modernists have never seen a slide rule let alone know how to use one.

Techno people are spoiled by the gadgets and tools available in this modern world and I'm not impressed when assholes get up at 2AM to stand in line to buy the very latest phone or pad or whatever. I suppose they don't get the fact that, while they are paying for their new toy, Apple or whoever has already designed the next "toy" that will make their new toy obsolete before they get it home. You will never see the LSF standing in anybody's line in order to buy a phone that does everything and that will send you to the poorhouse buying the apps. I have a cell phone that doesn't do anything except go ring ring. It is a phone. I will use my computer to go on line. I use the phone to make phone calls. Now my phone can text, and I will text you back if you text me, but every time I do I have the feeling that I am a sixteen year old girl. I don't like the feeling.

In closing I will tell you how I really feel about technology and things like Facebook. Fuck technology!

Monday, September 12, 2011


Wow, and double wow. When one is blessed with ADD, a weekend like we've just been through is an amazing experience. We had plenty of games to watch and I am glad that I replaced the batteries in my remote because I used the thing thousands of times switching back and forth from one game to another.

For us Phillies fans it's beginning to look a lot like Xmas after sweeping the Braves and then taking three out of four from the Brewers. Given that the Braves' troubles continued after our series, I am comfortable believing that the division title will reside in the greatest city in the world once again. While nice, it won't be enough to get the LSF to slurp the red Kool-Aid - as only another pennant and series win can do that.

Yesterday's loss to the Brewers was kind of a reality check showing us that they can not win every game, although I'm sure that many of the faithful have started to believe that they can and will. Sorry gang, but yesterday was a contest that should remind you that Raul Ibanez can strike out with the best of them and that, despite hitting home run number 33, Ryan Howard is fully capable of popping up with two men on base and the game on the line. Not to worry, it's on to Houston where we must face Brett Meyers in game one. On paper, the Phillies should sweep these guys but they don't play the games on paper so, until the games are put in the win column, let's not count our chickens. The Gods Of Baseball may be ready to fuck with us and, if they do, there will be nothing any of us can do about it.

So, with the first big college football weekend behind us we were treated to some decent games. Penn State discovered that it is far easier to beat Indiana State than it is Alabama. The Tide rolled into Happy Valley and exposed the Lions for what they are - not quite ready for prime time. In my opinion, they are a mediocre big time team and will struggle in the Big Ten.

Most glaring was the obvious difference in the quality of the players on the field. Alabama came with some very talented players who were well coached and the outcome was already decided by halftime. Penn State no longer gets the best players and the performance on the field shows it. I have been a rabid PSU fan for a great many years and have watched some awesome players don the blue and white. I have seen them compete favorably with the top programs and have seen them go undefeated on several occasions. Those days of greatness are over. I will continue to root for them, but I fear that something has to happen that many of us Nittany Fans had hoped would never come up.

For at least ten years there have been those that have been calling for Joe Paterno to retire. To them I have always stated that I thought, given his record and contributions to the sport and the school, he deserved to be allowed to coach as long as he wanted to. Sorry Joe, but the LSF now believes that the time has come for you to learn how to play golf or whatever because it has become painfully obvious that you can no longer compete for the top athletes nor can you coach the team against the powerhouses of the sport. Yes, you have 402 victories but let's be real - many of them have come at the expense of the Indiana States and the Temples of the world. Victories against top ranked teams are now fewer and far between. Joe, it is time to turn over the program. Everyone will miss you and our memories of great teams and high graduation rates will not soon be forgotten.

So, I got through Saturday watching bits and piece of a ton of games and now it was time to do the NFL thing and Fantasy Football. I watched most of the Eagles game and came away favorably impressed at their play. Vick did get hit more than I liked but the O-Line held up well enough to allow him to lead the team to a win over a rebuilding Rams squad. A win is a win, but clearly our guys had better not believe that they are a Dream Team since they still need a lot of improvement. At least I didn't have to listen to Andy tell me that "we have to do better." Next week's game against the Falcons will prove to be a bigger test for the Birds, especially since the Falcons lost their opener and will be playing at a high level of intensity.

After the Eagles game, I watched the Phillies lose and then turned on the favorite channel of every ADD-stricken football fan - The NFL Red Zone. The Red Zone is great for guys like me since it fucks with you by switching around from game to game, and usually just when you are getting in to watching a particular game. They did focus a bit on the Panthers and Cam Newton, who lit up the field to set a new first career game passing record. This kid has all the tools and, with some seasoning, could become one of the best. With the new collective bargaining agreement reducing the pay for rookies he probably is making less now than he did at Auburn but I imagine that he will be rewarded in the future.

Kevin (I can't spell my name) Kolb looked okay in his first start as a Cardinal, as did Rex Grossman in his debut as the Redskin QB. Watching the Giants-Redskins game gave me a bunch of mixed feelings. The good news is that the Giants lost - always a good thing. The bad news is that the Redskins won, never a good thing. Giants coach Tom Coughlin set a NFL coaching record for saying fuck and shit more than any coach in history but, given the hot seat he is on, I'm not surprised.

In other good news, the Jets were able to mount a late comeback sending the Cowboys home as losers. I am always happy when any Texas team loses and especially so when the Cowboys do. It was a perfect ending to my weekend of being a serial game watcher.

Then, there is tonight. Going into tonight's action, I am clinging on to a six point lead in my Fantasy opener. That means that my remote will have to do some work switching me back and forth between the Phillies and the Monday night football game. There is no rest for the weary.

Have a great week, and remember it is not time for Kool-Aid of any color.

Thursday, September 8, 2011


Wow! Tonight is going to be a night made for those of us who experience attention deficit disorder. We won't know where to turn first. Thank god someone invented the remote control, otherwise we'd have to get off our fat asses every time we wanted to switch back to the football game or to listen to the Republicans snoring while a gelded Obama lays out his latest jobs proposal that has no chance of passing.

Think about it: The Phillies open up a four game series with the Brewers; the NFL opens the regular season in Green Bay; Obama is addressing a joint session of congress; and most important - it is the start of the fantasy football season. All of this is tonight. The remote will be in my hand and will be called upon to go over and above the call of duty.

So, last night I get home from my dance class and find the Phillies and the Braves locked in a 1-1 tie. I was fortunate in missing Mr. Howard striking out with the bases loaded because, had I seen it, I would have lost the good mood I was in. For all you sabermetric folks who keep telling me how valuable Howard is, what does striking out with the bases jammed do to your model?

Who would have thought that Ross Gload would have been the hero of the night with his ninth inning hit that gave the Phillies a sweep of the Braves? If you tell me that you knew Gload was going to drive in the winning run you are either a pathological liar or you were higher than I have ever been. Nonetheless it was a great to sweep the crackers - kind of reminded me of last year. The Braves are now ten and a half games out and, in my opinion, have no shot at catching the candystripers. The Brewers, however, are another story.

I am getting sick and tired of being told by announcers and pundits at how good the Brewers are at home. Going into tonight's game they are 50-19 at home which I admit is a helluva good record. However, they do get to play a lot of games against the Cubs and my beloved Pirates and against the Cardinals, who are having a sub-par year. The Phillies have a 49-22 home record which isn't too shabby either, so I call on the pundits and other such assholes to shut the fuck up. I won't go so far as to call for a Phillies sweep in Milwaukee but it would not surprise me if they at least win two of the four games. Despite the fact that we won't have Utley, somehow the infield will do just fine with Valdez and Martinez. It would be nice for Howard to contribute, but we can't count on him so perhaps it will be Ibanez, Mayberry, or someone else who will create enough runs to allow the staff to do what they do best. I know that Ryan Braun is having a great season - but facing Cubs pitching is not the same as facing our guys all in a row. While I'm not ordering up the Red Kool-Aid yet I feel good about this series. My feeling good could be the kiss of death, so take my confidence with a grain of salt.

I won't be ordering any green Kool-Aid anytime soon since I think the Eagles may underwhelm a whole lot of folks. Yes, they did sign every free agent d-back on the planet during the off season, but two big problems remain that could sink their season. Andy Reid is still the coach, and I still maintain that the Eagles will never win a title with the Lord Of Lard in control. His game day skills are pathetic whether you speak of his play calling or his clock management. The other major problem is still the offensive line. They can't block anyone no matter how many times they move players around. I was shocked at the announcement the other day that Danny Watkins - the teams first round draft pick - will not be opening the season as a starter. The fireman from Canada they now claim is not ready for prime time and will be replaced by a guy who will have had four practices as an Eagle when they open up against the Rams on Sunday. The fact that veteran center Jamaal Jackson has been replaced by a smaller more athletic rookie I believe that Michael Vick could get killed as early as game one. The team did improve on the d-line, but the three linebackers have virtually no experience and, until they prove they can handle themselves, I won't be forgetting Chuck Bednarik any time soon. Should I mention that the kicking game is now in the hands of two rookies? It could be a very long season for the Birds and perhaps at the end of the season Fat Andrew will finally be made accountable for poor drafting, poor coaching, and poor post game press conferences. I am sick and tired of hearing, "We've got to do better".

This is a very good time of the year for the LSF. I can spew my venom against Ryan Howard and Andy Reid at the same time. It doesn't get any better than that. I'd expound but I need to make sure that I put fresh batteries in the remote so that I can get through the night.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011


I trust everyone had a nice Labor Day Weekend. Whether you did or you didn't today is back to work day and I'm having trouble with the fact that it is Tuesday and not Monday. Seriously, when I went to read Paul Krugman in the NYT I found that he wasn't at the top of the Op-Ed page as he usually is on Monday morning. Oh shit - it's Tuesday, not Monday. I suppose I should have read him yesterday, but yesterday felt like Sunday, so I didn't even look for him. This may seem like a minor problem to most but, shit, yesterday was Monday. The LSF will be confused about the day of the week all week, and I don't like being anymore confused than normal.

So, there I was at the 6200 block of Pine Street's annual Labor Day Block Party yesterday and I couldn't help but think at how sad it is that those who grew up in the suburbs missed the block party tradition. As you know, the suburbs don't normally have block parties. There is no reason why cul-de-sacs and tree lined streets of stone houses couldn't have a block party - they just don't. What a pity. At the Pine Street fest the aromas of ribs and chicken slowly cooking on charcoal grills was tantalizing and made one want to do nothing but eat. The sounds of soul music blared from several boom boxes and we danced in the street. My mother grew up on that block in West Philly and I doubt that she and her neighbors did anything remotely like the electric slide in the middle of the street, but she would have had a good time doing it.

After dancing, I sat down and played pinochle - something I hadn't done in years. The brothers I played with beat me up pretty bad in the game which saw the conversation turn to the upcoming NFL season. Guys talk about sports so talking about football is nothing out of the normal. To me, what has always been out of the normal are the number of Philadelphians who love the Dallas Cowboys. What's up with that? I have hated the Cowboys almost from their inception, but here I was playing cards with a guy who not only was wearing a Cowboy shirt, but had a gold Cowboy helmet dangling around his neck and a watch with the Cowboy logo on his wrist. How sad.

There were a bunch of games played over the weekend and I did get to watch a few of them. The Phillies looked like shit against the Marlins. There is no reason under the sun that Florida should ever take a series from the candystripers, but they did. I wrote last week that I hoped the Phillies wouldn't look past the fish to the series with the Braves, but they must have, and I was more than a little bit nervous about the Braves coming to town. One of the things we have seen lately is the damage done to Halladay in the first inning of games he starts. It happened again this weekend. The pattern has Halladay giving up runs in the first before settling down and going through the other team's line up like shit goes through a goose. The offense shuts down and the Phillies lose a game they shouldn't. Perhaps given this disturbing trend, Charlie should take a different approach when Halladay is scheduled to pitch.

When Halladay is scheduled to start Charlie should deal with the first inning like it was the seventh or eighth and start one of his set up men instead of Halladay. He should use one of his closers in the second and bring Halladay into the third. That way Roy can't fuck up the first inning and can bring his team another win. Hey, it MIGHT work.

And what can I say about Cliff Lee? Awesome just doesn't seem enough. The guy made the Braves look like a certain local vintage "base ball" squad as the Phillies offense erupted. Watching the game last night was a pure joy, especially the incredible catch made by Ryan Howard of a foul ball. The guy showed some great hustle on the play making a sliding catch that should have been shown a bunch of times on all of the highlight shows. He also hit home run number 31 and was on base all night. I still don't like the guy but, in the spirit of fairness, I must give him credit for a great game. I notice that he has hit five homers in the last nine games. Let's hope he can continue to do this until the end of the season, but we'll have to wait and see about that. My guess is that he won't given the sub par season he has had but, if he does, I'll salute him.

That's it for now as I have some shit to take care of this Monday - I mean Tuesday morning. I'll leave you with a warning. If you care about your children, stop worrying about Chaz Bono and focus instead on not allowing your children to see the new uniforms that the Maryland Terps are wearing. Without a doubt they are the ugliest uniforms I have ever seen. Check them out in the Washington Post - but be careful as you may laugh all day when you see them.

Friday, September 2, 2011


As we head into the Labor Day Weekend, our sports plate is filled to overflowing. It reminds me of the plates of fat people at places like Country Buffet or other such places where, for a nominal price, one can eat themselves into food-induced oblivion.

The 2011 college football season opened up last night and the LSF was pumped to the max. I love college football and normally would watch the "student athletes" over the pay-for-play guys every time. Last night I tried to watch the Runnin' Rebels of UNLV take on the Wisconsin Badgers but, after less than a half, I couldn't deal with yet another example of an over-matched team being led to the slaughter so its school can get a big pay day. I did want to watch the Temple-Villanova Mayor's Cup game but couldn't find it on my Comcast system. The Owls crushed the 'Cats 42-7. Given my antipathy towards anything Villanova I am pleased with the result.

So, given the boredom of the Wisconsin game, I picked up my remote and checked in to the Eagles-Jets pre-season game. I endured this nonsense for a few series and said my good-byes to the people wearing the Eagles uniform for the last time. The team has to get down to 53 players this coming week and many who were on the field last night will be counted in next week's unemployment number.

As you know, Fat Andrew made OL Danny Watkins his first round pick in the late draft - which means that no matter how bad he looks - he will be starting next week against the Rams. He'll line up next to rookie center Jason Kelce. I hope that the Eagles q-backs have great health insurance plans since, with these two anchoring the middle of the O-line, they're going to need it. The rookies have not shown that they are ready to protect Vick or Young or whoever is running the offense after those two are crushed by every linebacker in the NFC East. When Watkins was drafted he was working as a fire fighter. If he was good at it, perhaps he should go back to it, since he hasn't shown that he is good at blocking. I'll bone up on the Kaddish (the Jewish prayer for the dead) since one or more of our q-backs is likely to be killed by an onrushing opponent.

My remote got me to the Yankees-Red Sox game which turned out to be very entertaining. Duncan loaded the bases in the bottom of the ninth creating much drama but, in the end, he struck out the last batter and handed the second place Bombers a much-needed victory.

Of course, I did also watch the Phillies beat the Reds in the getaway game in Cinncy. The candystripers brought their brooms to the Queen City and Vance Worley got his tenth win. Moat Man hit his thirtieth homer yesterday, making it six seasons in a row with at least thirty home runs and a hundred RBI's. When asked about this feat Howard said, "It's cool." Duh, what about hitting .248 - is that cool? My hero of the game was Michael Martinez, who hit a two run shot bringing his home run total to three for the season.

So, this weekend will serve up something for just about everyone. If you are into tennis, the U.S. Open is in full swing up in NYC. The LSF doesn't watch a lot of tennis, but does enjoy the Williams sisters - Serena and Venus. Venus had to drop out of the tourney due to an autoimmune disease but Serena is still involved - so I do have some interest in the event.

The Phillies will spend the weekend playing the Marlins and I hope they don't end up sleeping with the fishes by not taking the Marlins seriously while looking ahead to the next series against the Braves.

The Braves still think they can win it all and a good bitch-slapping by the Phillies next week would go a long way in making them understand that they can't win it all. We need a repeat of last year's end of season Brave bashing and, if we get it, I might start believing that the Gods of Baseball want the Phils to go far into the playoffs. I only hope that the gods aren't setting us up for a crash and burn against the D-Backs or worse - the Yankees in the series.

Finally, if you are as much of a college football junkie as I am, this weekend will be awesome. All of the top teams are in action and all should look very good playing Bumblefuck Tech or, in the case of my beloved Nittany Lions, Indiana State. The games will be one-sided but, with a menu of hundreds of games to watch, I will be a happy camper. In case you want to know who the LSF is rooting for, here are a couple of axioms I live by: Axiom number one is to always root for Bumblefuck Tech to pull the once in a lifetime upset against a nationally ranked team, Axiom number two is to always root against the team wearing a goofy looking uniform when they are playing a team with a classic uniform. I loathe the uniforms worn by schools like Oregon or Boise State where they either have weird color schemes or stripes running every which way - giving me a headache. Ooh, that reminds me of a third axiom! When both teams are wearing silly uniforms - root for injuries.

So, whether you will be attending one of the many block parties that will be held in the hoods, going to the shore, or to a pristine suburban park for a cook-out, enjoy the games, the festivities, and one of the last chances to see scantily-clad women as the weather will soon turn cold and the lovelies will be bundled up.