Bobby Thompson Is Smiling

Congratulations to the San Francisco Giants! It's about fucking time!

During tonights post game interview Russ Hodges asked former long time Giant manager John McGraw what he thought about tonights Giants World Series victory. "What's the big deal? Why these guys have been out here since 1958 and this is the first time they've able to pull this off. Shit, my teams played in a place that could fit two of these little league parks, and they still could hit the daylights out of the ball." But sir, this team showed grit, determination, and moxie as well as lights out pitching. What say you to that? "Russ, we've both been dead for a long time, but you can't believe these guys are that good. This junkie, whats his name?...Linoleum, or something like that? Why my guy Mathewson could pitch on no days rest and get these guys out. As bad as that guy Burrell looked, he would have been crying like the bitch that he is after Chris was through with him.

What our boy McGraw is overlooking is the fact that this Giant team does exactly what his boys did at the turn of the last century. Like the Giants of old they scratch and claw every day, and they have the best pitching in baseball. Sorry, fellow long suffering Phillies fans, but they do. If the 21 year old Bumgardner or whatever his name is continues to develop the way he pitched this post season the Giants will have 4 quality acelike pitchers. And, they can use Sanchez as trade bait for some outfield help if they choose. Yes I know that Doc is one of the top two or three hurlers in the game. The problem comes after Doc, because neither Hamels or Oswalt quite measure up to Cain and possibly the kid. The other problem is that this weird beard doesn't take a back seat to any closer in the game today except maybe Rivera. (There is a rumor on Fox, that after tomorrows election, the republicans are going to have Rivera and all other latino players deported. An unnamed spokesperson for Sharon Angle days that the game should be played by Americans and that the influx of latin players over the past few decades is undermining our democracy. If you can imagine he went on to say, these latinos are paid a kings ransom, and receive health benefits to boot. We are opposed to any participation by latinos in organized baseball.

I drift.

We continue our postgame interviews: Red Barber here, and I've got the two most favorite guys named Willie in SF. Let me start with you Mr Sey Hey. You were a member of the last Giant team to win the series, back in 1954 when your Giants swept the favored Cleveland Indians. What does tonights win mean to you. Well Red, let me tell you. I'm glad for the fans. They been waitin a long time.........Hey Red....Willie McCovey, I'll get to you next. No man! How come whenever me and him are together, you guys always want to talk to him first. Shit man, I wasn't chopped liver you know...hell they got a Cove named after me! Willie Mays, I'll ask again what does mean to you. Not much, really. I mean, they ain't paying me nothing to be there. I mean how cheap can they be. Why are you laughing McCovey? Shit man, they are paying me, ha ha ha.

This is the Redbird, and while the two Willies battle this out I'll return you to your long suffering Phillies fan after these words from our sponsor Rhinegold Beer.

I am depressed. I wasn't rooting for the Giants to win as much as I was rooting for Texas to lose. A sweep would have been nice, especially since Dubya would have been on record as throwing out the first pitch for the Giants clincher.

I am depressed because unless Comcast starts offering a winter league package I won't be able to hear the crack of the ball off of the bat again until next spring, and that sucks big time. That sound is something that always grabs your attention, much in the same way a well shaped derriere on a 24 year old female does. Funny thing about that. (Hell I am 40 years too old for both being able to make that sound with one of my swings, and I have clothes older than the female with the great young ass - I tell you, getting old is not for sissies!)

Think about it. Our choices are to watch Andy Reid cast a bigger shadow every week or if you prefer, you can watch the Flyers at the beginning of the neverending hockey season. I couldn't tell you the names of 5 Flyers - thats how much I care aboot that sport. Don't get me wrong I would like them to win because they are from the greatest city in the world. (Can you imagine if you were forced to live in Omaha) I am keeping an open mind about becomming a hockey fan, but not until they start playing the 4th quarter. Maybe Canadians can only count to three, but games that I watch either have two halves (excluding soccer), four quarters or nine innings. I do not watch games with only three quarters because it lacks symmetry. I know they call them periods, but that is only done by a foreign power to upset our bodily fluids. We need to close the border with Canada and deport all hockey players to Latvia, Estonia, or if their name is Lars to some country that has white shit on the ground 13 months a year.
Lastly, you could watch the 76ers. Hmmmmm, they really suck, like the Phillies used to. Too many guys stealing their checks (can you say Elton Brand or Iguadala) and what looks like another sixer first round bust - Turner.

Gang, it's gonna be a long winter for this long suffering fan, but when the blizzards of the winter turn to the slush of March we'll be able to hear that sound again and we'll know that all will be well.

Have a great off-season!